I have a bad feeling that something evil is following me. Something has not felt right for a couple days. Sometimes in the morning I almost catch a glimpse of it, but before I see it, it has disappeared.

Today a heaviness has settled in, and I am a little scared. I want it to go away quietly, but it is mostly beyond my control.

My Christmas holiday starts tomorrow, and when I leave the Island, I hope the beast stays behind. I know it will try to hitch a ride across the water, trailing me, taunting me. I hope I am strong enough to ward it off now before it gathers its full strength, yet I fear I am not.

Christmas it a time of joy, not a time for hiding. It is a time to spend with loved ones, not mourning in a cold room alone.

I think I am coming down with the same sickness that has afflicted so many of my friends. I want it to go away. I have too much to do tonight and tomorrow to get sick. That and I absolutely despise being sick during Christmas. I feel rotten and depressed when I am sick, and generally just want to be left alone. Yet with Christmas I want to be happy and cheerful and in the company of loved ones.